Sucker Free Summer In Danger of Sucking

No seriously though. According to WFAA (Dallas/Fort Worth), El Chupacabra is rampaging Texan Cattle, dressed like a Chihuahua. A hairless Chihu---

Okay, ya know, I can't even get serious about this. It has nothing to do with Farmers who are losing livestock or the mythical Chupa itself. It has everything to do with the fact that damnit, not one good picture...not one video. Not one honest-to-true corpse. Just...annoying shit like this: "I saw a Chupacabra and it ate my dog."

I refuse to take this shit serious anymore.